I’m terrified of water. I’m not just aquaphobic, I’m also aquaphobic by proxy. I can’t watch – or even think of – other people struggling in water without breaking out in a sweat in which I could, ironically, drown. (Incidentally, I’m just as frightened of ironic drownings.) Whenever a soap starlet or Hollywood hero finds themselves in deeper water than … Read More
The walls have fears…
Strangely, I spent twenty minutes recently reading graffiti in a ladies’ toilet. Rest assured, there was no fibre-deficient reason for me hanging around a much-disinfected university cubicle on a Wednesday afternoon and, while I’m an avid reader, I’m not normally so captivate by the eyeliner-scrawled Joanie loves Chachis that I’ll brave the ecosystem of a public lavvy for longer than … Read More